It’s still pretty cold here in Seattle (although a couple of weeks ago it was warm enough to feel like spring is around the corner) and quite honestly, most days I am still tempted to just lounge around in my mama wear. I got the yoga pant outfit down, and while there is absolutely nothing wrong with said outfit, it just doesn’t make me feel how I want to really feel about myself:
Even when I’m dressing up, I’m often pulled towards comfort, which I still want. But what I really really want? More sass, more soul and definitely more style.
Really, just more of me.
I’m not the kind to swoon over clothes and shoes in public. I rarely gush over stuff.
But all that is about to change.
Like how I’ve been pretty bored with my almost knee-high boots lately and have been
lusting wanting these:
(Gasp! OMG. Did I just say I want new shoes? But I do! I really do! Good-bye Old Me who always puts a lid on what I really want, always thinking about what the money could be better spent on especially when it comes to things like shoes. But dang it, I really do want these new shoes! Aren’t they pretty?)
I’m slowly embracing my inner fashionista, emphasis being on SLOWLY because I still somedays end up listening to that wickedly convincing voice that taunts me every time I try to consciously pick out what clothes to wear for the day. Blech! Am I the only one struggling with this?
For years, I’ve always said I hated shopping, but the truth is, I just hated the inner battle that would commence after yet another shopping spree. There’s a big part of me that classifies fashion as worldly and almost sinful (thanks to years of religious brainwashing and my own freak set of old beliefs about women and the body) but I’m setting myself free! Wheeee! I love clothes! I like fashion! I love my womanly body and I want to dress her in ways that celebrate her beauty!
I want to be able to look in the mirror and love, and I mean really love what I see.
I also have to remind myself that this, this Year of the Dress is a journey. And a very personal one at that. There’s healing. There’s growing. There’s learning to be.
I went from yoga-pants mama to well, a dress-wearing mama.
Way To Go, Vina!
And so I celebrate all the effort I’m putting into this.
Except I just don’t want effort.
I want heart. I want soul.
I’m thinking something more like this:
or OMG, this:
But do I dare?
Do I dare say yes to what I really want?
Do I dare honor and indulge my desires?
Do I dare say yes to being seen?
Do I dare say yes to being the beautiful me?
And that, my friends, is the real question.
What about you? Do you have your own freak set of issues when it comes to fashion and well, being beautiful? I’d love to hear.
Oh, and Some Of My Favorite Mama/Fashion Bloggers To Check Out:
- What’s Your Tale, Nightingale?: A fashion blog by an old friend of mine, Eunice Do who calls herself a nerd (except if she is, I think she is one beautiful nerd). We were on a mission trip together a long time ago, and I so LOVE her style.
- Bleubird Vintage: I probably don’t need to introduce Miss James to the world because the world already knows about her pretty darn well. I adore her style, and everything else she shares on her blog. I’m so in love with her little birdie (second to mine of course!) I really think I’m turning into a vintage junkie!
- A Beautiful Mess: I can’t get enough of this blog, really. Elsie and the gang just inspire me. Absolute swoon.
- Kendi Everyday: I love this girl’s style too. Not vintage, but hey, I’m somewhat eclectic with my taste. I love that she wears Payless shoes and you can’t even tell at all! I don’t heart fashion blogs that are all about high-end clothing few of us can splurge on.