The Real Reason I Couldn’t Start Blogging Again


I’ve been wanting to blog here again like, forever and for some reason, couldn’t get myself to write a single.damn.thing.  Sure, I’ve been a bit preoccupied with Nia and most recently, essential oils and doTerra (which have been rocking my world!) but I want to share with you today the real honest-to-goodness reason why I’ve been stuck. Because I think it might actually cheer you up if you happen to be feeling any negative feelings about your domestic life.

It’s because our house has been a tad bit more chaotic than what I’m willing to let on.

I cursed myself when I named this blog A Nourishing Home because every time I feel like I am off the mark and our house is showing the least bit not-so-nourishing signs,  I readily call myself a fraud and hide.


I must say that it’s not so easy trying to rock this un-schooling life along with my entrepreneurial aspirations AND keep everyone in the family healthy and nourished, myself included.

It’s not that I don’t have enough time or energy.

It’s that old monsters come out and try to frighten the hell out of me. That or just get me to buy into beliefs and negative thoughts that devalue what I do here at home. Or inflate my ego while working on my business . Or just altogether crush any confidence I have that I can do this, gosh damn it.

Or the worst, they shame me into ignoring my struggles. 


My message here on this blog is that Motherhood doesn’t have to be a struggle. And it’s true. Life doesn’t have to be a struggle. Yet we all struggle, despite the fact that we don’t have to. We are designed for an Abundant Life, and yet many of us live in scarcity everyday. We are designed for Greatness, and yet many of us settle for a life on autopilot. We are designed for Relationships, and yet many of us struggle to deeply connect with others.

The real problem is that we dream of the Ideal we are designed for without taking time to shine the light on our reality. We make vision boards and affirmations without taking a moment to NAME and ACKNOWLEDGE the habits that we feel ashamed about.

They say what we resist persists and without identifying not just the habits but more importantly the unconscious beliefs we have  that don’t serve our highest purpose (that we don’t have enough ______ or what we don’t really belong or that we are not good enough etc), we doom ourselves.

And we do silly things like start a million blog posts and never hit publish.ever. again.

The truth is, it’s ok to struggle.


And often, just the mere admission that you are SETS YOU FREE.

And poof, just like that, you hit the publish button and you are back on the game.

Are you struggling with anything? Do you find it hard to admit when and what you struggle with? Vulnerability is the new black, mama. Spill it and watch it ignite your road to liberation. 


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  1. Christa says

    Yes! I am currently struggling with a mild depression and trying to go around it and work with it in life right now. I have made some headway recently, but ultimately, I can never “make” depression go away through certain actions or being positive or whatever. I have to accept it and live as fully as I can (while going to therapy of course) until it floats away in its own time.

    I’m interested in the fact that you don’t think struggles need to happen in life. I guess I view them as a necessary or even a good part of life (like good in the end because they change you….. Not good in the moment.). Explain?

  2. Vina Barham says

    Hi Christa! So here is what I think or am exploring. We all grow up thinking that struggle is a normal part of life, and that in fact it is good. That we need to struggle to grow. But what do we mean by that? What do we mean by struggle? Struggle has a lot of negative emotions attached to it. It feels so heavy. What if what we really mean is effort? Like, how a child puts a lot of effort into learning how to walk or talk, but we don’t consider them to be struggling. Struggle is not a natural part of our development as human beings – we create this idea of struggle because we create these expectations in our lives and struggle is really because of our beliefs and feelings about ourselves. But that in reality, there is no struggle. We are just growing up, learning how to be, just like the baby who is learning to do the very essential things in life. No struggle, just effort.

    Now let’s say the baby is a “special needs” kid and there we start to create the idea of struggle. That they will struggle with this and that but really we are just creating the beliefs around the circumstances. Yes, they will have to learn how to operate in this world in their condition that is different from the majority of kids, but it only becomes a struggle when we assign value to how much and how often and how big their strides have to be, etc.

    I am saying it’s okay to struggle, even though I believe we don’t have to. Because we create the struggle with our beliefs and feelings. Some things will be hard, but it doesn’t have to be a struggle. We really have nothing to lose ever so nothing is really a struggle – just our perception. And when we have that perception, I’m saying, it’s ok. :)

    If that makes any sense.

  3. Christa says

    Clarification….. Do you have a different definition of struggle vs. something being hard? I think I was defining those as similar but what is the difference for you?

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