In this blog’s past life (oh, about six months ago), I dedicated my Tuesdays on writing about everything related to Food. I mostly focused on Real Food advocacy because my family was transitioning to a more sustainable way of eating. I was very much motivated at first to make EVERYTHING we eat from scratch, forego all the yucky processed food and vowed never to eat McDonald’s ever ever again.
But guess what?
I have broken that vow a few times and I probably will do so again. And I don’t make everything from scratch and I sometimes still feed my family something I know isn’t completely healthy. And for a long time, I felt like a complete faker. As if I can only be one or the other: an all-natural-cook-from scratch-granola-loving-grow-vegetables-kind of mom OR a Goldfish-and-Rice-A-Roni-and-Take-Out-kind of mom.
But I’m neither. I’m somewhere in the between and I’m totally okay with that.
Because I have learned to accept a few things:
- I am not a Martha Stewart and the kitchen is not my most favorite place to be. Which means that the more time I spend making all sorts of stuff in the kitchen, the more crabby I get and the less time I have to do more of what I enjoy of with my family. Which means I need to stick to a minimalist approach to cooking to get the most out of the short time I spend on it.
- I am a slow learner when it comes to cooking. Which means I have to take things slow and not make crazy goals, like learning how to make kombucha, making my own yogurt and soaking flour all at once. And that I had better focus on the simple but necessary things like putting a healthy and yummy dinner on the table every night.
- I tend to take three steps forward and two steps back. Which means I had better look at my overall progress instead of what I had failed to do this week. Because my overall progress from a couple of years ago gives me a much more accurate picture than focusing on my one decision to let my little toddler eat Chicken McNuggets at McDonalds: we’re growing some vegetables from our garden, we rarely buy take-out even though it means we might eat the same things that I have in my small repertoire of recipes that I can do well, I’ve learned to make awesome pot pies from scratch, and we rarely have junk food in our house.
Part of becoming an Authentic Mother is be honest about who you are and figure out strategies that work for you and your family, given your goals. It’s important to focus on the Essentials of Mothering instead of the Ideal Image of A Mother so you can tailor it to how you work best.
Are you a domestically-challenged mom like me? If so, how have you managed to make your house into a home your way? I would love to hear! If you liked this article, you might want to consider subscribing to A Nourishing Home. It’s free!
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8 Responses to “Tips Of Another Kind Tuesday: An Encouragement For The Domestically Challenged Mom”
Hi! I just found your blog and I liked this post. I do love to cook, and I am trying to feed my family mostly real foods, but that doesn’t mean that my kids don’t ever get goldfish or cheerios. I doubt we’re the only ones!
Angel´s last blog ..Kitchen teaser
great post!!
Aimee´s last blog ..Lovely Links
Thanks for this encouragement! The kitchen is my favorite place to be – I feel very confident as a cook. My housekeeping is another story. It took therapy to realize that my disorganization/clutter wasn’t the result of a character flaw. I grew up in chaos – never lived in a tidy home. Also, I’m wicked ADD. But, instead of giving up and giving into shame, I’m treating myself with grace. I’m also taking baby steps – I’m focusing on having the dishes done, bed made, and sink shiny. It’s starting small, but I’m happy that my kids are growing up in a cleaner home than I did. Maybe one day I’ll be a Martha Stewart, but for now I’m okay with being a committed student in remedial homemaking.
MamaBee´s last blog ..Learning to Cook- Part 2
Thanks! About a year ago is when I got serious about healthier, more natural eating. It has been a journey. Sometimes I feel so stressed about making sure ALL the food is good AND good for us. My son has never much like the homemade mac-n-cheese (I’ve tried several recipes), but he loves Kraft. So, I decided just this last shopping trip- I am going to buy that Kraft and be okay with it. Such a little thing yet it made me feel so relieved to just “give in!” I will continue other baby steps and not beat myself up if it takes a little while to learn or I still buy processed lunch meat and store brand cheese. I know there are lots of other things we are eating that are healthy and good. Always encouraging to hear another in a similar place!
Hi Michelle! I totally hear you! Here’s to enjoying the journey!
Hi Mama Bee. I envy your cooking skills.
But here is to treating ourselves with grace, like you said. Gotta love baby steps and yes, so glad there IS remedial home ec for the rest of us. 
Haha, yes, I’m sure there is more of us out there! Such a relief!
Vina – remember how I told you that my hubby calls me a granola with chocolate chips? This post is why!!! There is no way that I could ever be a purist in the homemaking area – I’m just not organized enough OR laid back enough. What I mean is that you have to be over the top type A to even remember to do everything (I’m only a classic type A personality); AND you have to be laid back enough to not affect your family in negative ways by your type A behaviors (I can only do the laid back thing if I’m not focusing on being super organized.) So there you go, I’m a granola with chocolate chips – chocolate chips may not be “good” for you, but I don’t want to live life without them