Welcome To Homespun Waldorf Readers!

Today, I am guest posting for Homespun Waldorf’s Winter Carnival: a diverse collection of bloggers bringing warmth to the cold days of February. We’re sharing winter ideas on making, pondering, nourishing and playing to kindle and inspire, and you’re invited to join us! Today, I share a very easy snack recipe for the little ones: homemade “Goldfish” crackers. Although they are not the most nourishing of snacks, I still make this occasional treat for my little girl who used to love the store-bought kind before I learned to make them at home.  For my dear ANH readers, I encourage you to visit and take a look around.

Also, I warmly welcome the Homespun Waldorf Readers to our humble space here at a Nourishing Home. We discuss an eclectic mix of ideas around here and I hope you find something worthwhile to take with you. We’ve always had a strong focus on self-care for moms, feminine spirituality, simple play,  authentic mothering, real food and  healthy treats, and well, much more. So stay awhile, make yourself at home and we hope you’ll join us here again soon!

Monday Meditations: From Pretense to Presence

Some days, I write (and live) from the heart. And sadly, some days, I write (and live) from a place of perceived identity, of illusions and expectations of who I am supposed to be.

And I was thankfully reminded lately that writing (and living) that way divides the Self – resulting in Confusion, Depression and all sorts of Life-Sucking Addictions.  Writing (and living) that way hurts and harms my Soul. Trying to be Someone I’m not is yet another tired old message added to the thousands of times I’ve told Myself in so many ways: You Are Not Enough.

The most common form of despair is not being who you are…Søren Kierkegaard 

I wonder where we get these messages that compel us to hide who we truly are. When does the Pretense start?

Perhaps it was the way we were raised, where we had to learn to be Obedient and live up to our parent’s expectations as the most significant way we can earn their approval and affirmation. We learned to be Who they want us to be most especially when we were punished when we were simply being who we are (and in many instances, we really were just being children and our parents totally blanked out and forgot what it was like.) Our first initiation to a Life of Pretense.

And then everything else, school, friends, religion, conspired to hide us behind a mask of sorts. Until we don’t even know what we look like.

To be nobody but myself-in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make me somebody else-means to fight the hardest battle any human can fight, and never stop fighting.
 e.e. cummings 

Perhaps our most important task then as mothers, as sisters, as wives, as women, is to move from Pretense to Presence. To come home fully to ourselves, and show up in the world just as we are – sorta brilliant and sorta broken.  Because Pretense can only breed Pretense. And our children do not need to start wearing masks at such a young age. Actually, they don’t need to be wearing any masks at all, not now or ever.

And the unmasking begins with me.

So…how are you unmasking today?

Art and the Mother, Everyday Creatix Edition: Go Forth and Create Every Chance You Get

Note: Last week, I shared about the day I danced again. I had planned on sharing more about my upcoming Nia White Belt Training this week but realized  I didn’t have much to say about it yet and that perhaps, it’s best to write more on that when I’m actually going through the training. Or right after it. It’s a little over a month and I’m still trying to save/come up with money for it. So I wanted to ask if you knew anyone who needed blog design work of some sort, and could you would you please refer me? Or, if you are feeling mighty generous and this blog has helped you in any way, could you perhaps consider making a donation towards helping me make my dream a reality? You could email me or leave a comment below! My deepest thanks!

I think it was Pablo Picasso who said this, ”Every child is born an artist, the problem is to remain one once they grow up.”

And I absolutely wholeheartedly gosh-darn-it agree.

I am an Artist.

And so are you.

Except if you are like most people, myself included, chances are you’ve forgotten that you are.  And that perhaps is one of the biggest lies that keep us from living the Life that is truly Ours.

I 100% believe that we each possess a Gift or Gifts to offer the world. We are all Gifted in a sense – we’ve been gifted with  Something valuable to the world and unique to only us.  One of the biggest tasks we have as parents is to preserve our children’s Artist self so that they grow up knowing how they are meant to serve the world.

:: Pause ::

It took a long time for me to start calling myself an Artist. But when I did, I started to have this persistent longing to Create all the time. I started this blog. I wrote every chance I got.  I bought charcoal pencils, water color, paints, different kinds of paper, books and so forth and used them with my little girl whenever we could. I sought out opportunities to create with my daughter, learning to draw animals for instance (she LOVES animals) as showed in the photo above. She loves stories and I seized the opportunity to hone my storytelling skills. And perhaps my favorite, we sing songs all the time and I’ve taken up to relearning piano, which I played a little in my childhood and picking up the guitar, which I learned in high school.   I also saw my time in the kitchen as a way to create even more.

And the more I Created, the closer I felt to discovering who I am and what my Life’s Work is. I am learning that following the longing to create and make Art is big part of what it means to be human. If you are not creating, you are not fulfilling your purpose as a human being.

Because the simple truth is this: To be human is to create.

Your Turn: Are you ready to acknowledge that you are an Artist? Do you know what it is that you want to create and bring forth into the world? As usual, tweet and like below and spread the word if you liked this article, or if you think someone else could use the encouragement. Thank you!

Soulful Homemaking, Notes To Self Edition: How I Kept My Kitchen Clean All Day Today

I was gonna take a picture of my freakin’ clean sink to show off. Except I forgot. But seriously, for the first time ever, the said sink was clean the entire stinking day. And not because I avoided using the kitchen entirely. I made 3 meals, a few snacks and a couple of smoothies today.

(Oh, okay, I did have a sitter for a couple of hours when I ran to the coffee shop to have some me-time and I forgot to wash a couple of dishes right before I took off. But still. It was clean almost all day.)

And so I stumbled on a secret that I’m sure is not a secret to many of you already but was a huge epiphany to me, the unlikely of all homemakers. And that is this:

Clean Up As You Go.

I know. Huge, right?

And yet I often just lazily let the stuff pile up on top of each other, as if by ignoring the growing pile, it’s going to make my work later a whole lot easier.

Because I suppose that’s sort of our natural tendency. An inclination to ignore the Present in favor of the Future (or the Past.)

That or sometimes in my case, I tend to overvalue the product over the process. I focus on the actual meal that is coming together that I totally ignore the practice necessary to make it, clean up included.

Or maybe I am totally over-thinking this whole thing.

Whatever.

My New Kitchen Philosophy: One Spoon At A Time

And so, even if just to serve as a reminder (hence the Notes To Self edition), I hereby declare a new kitchen tradition in the Barham household, in which I focus my attention, lovingly, to one spoon at a time. The end result is a kitchen I could not only tolerate but really like throughout the day, and perhaps much more importantly, live a bit closer to Presence than not.

Because really? A clean sink, as it turns out, makes me very happy.

Your Turn: What about you? Have you tried this tip before? As usual, feel free to like or tweet this article below if you are so inclined. That would be awesome.

Real Food Hacks, Comfort Food Edition: 7 Ways To Make Pizza More Nourishing

IMG_6619

My husband loves pizza. And so when he joined me in my grain-free diet for a month, pizza was the first thing he wanted to eat soon after. And well, my daughter takes after some of his father (okay, a lot!) and she loves her carbs too!

So instead of trying to deprive them of what they love to eat, I decided that I’m going to devote this year to learning how to make the food they love a bit lot more nourishing. And Real Food Hacks, Comfort Food Edition was born.

And this week, I bring you a round up of all the ways you can serve the All-American Pizza to your family and feel so good about it.

Better For You Pizza Dough

Cauliflower Version (Grain Free) by Emily from Joyful Abode

Almond Flour With White Beans Version (Grain Free) by Carrie from Ginger Lemon Girl.

Coconut Flour Version (Grain Free) by Sarah from Healthy Home Economist.

Sourdough Pizza Crust by Erin (Guest Post) from Gnowfglins

Soaked Pizza Crust by Heather from Mommypotamus

Almond Flour + Buckwheat Flour (Gluten Free) by Angela at Oh She Glows.

 Quinoa Pizza Dough by Alta at Tasty Eats at Home

Better For Your Sauce and Toppings

Of course, making your own pizza sauce, using whole milk cheese from pastured cows and nitrate-free pepperoni (if that’s your favorite topping ever, like my husband) make the whole ensemble even more nourishing. And one final tip to sneak in even more veggies in this whole mix? Sneaky Chef Missy recommends adding a puree of carrots and sweet potato to your pizza sauce. And of course, if your family doesn’t faint at the sight of greens on their plates, adding peppers/spinach/etc to your toppings make this meal the kind of pizza you’ll love serving again and again at home.

Your Turn: Any comfort foods you’ve turned into nourishing meals in the kitchen? Or any comfort foods your family loves and you need a little help figuring out how to upgrade it in the nourishing department?  As usual, if you liked this article, sharing is the kind thing to do!

Velveteen Mama Diaries: Somedays, I Don’t Love Being A Mama

Yes, tis true.

Most days, I adore motherhood. I love having to slow down and embrace the wonder of it all. I love watching my daughter learn and grow. I love going through the rhythms of our days and seasons together. But I’ll be honest. Many days, I’d love to just spend hours upon hours of me-time. The best gift anyone can ever give me at this point in my life? The time and the space to work on my own projects – where I want, when I want.

I would love to have a chunk of my days when I’m just left to my own world so I can create to my heart’s delight, and pursue my artist path.

I would love to be able to cook on my own pace, with a glass of Pinot Noir and music of my own choosing instead of yet another rendition of her current favorite song: Tomorrow (Annie).

:: Pause ::

Most days, I’m able to find the sweet spot of doing what I love with my daughter. It’s the only sustainable way I can mother with authenticity. But there are days when I just want to do what I love alone.

Most days, I’m able to find pleasure and joy in the things I wouldn’t choose to do (things like cooking and making sure my daughter has clean undies), yet are necessary for me to nourish my family. It’s the only way I can carpe the heck out of this diem. But there are days when I just want the luxury of not doing any of these things at all.

:: Pause ::

The funny thing is, it took motherhood for me to figure out what these things were that brought me so much joy. It took motherhood for me to reconnect with my childhood dreams, with my capacity to create and the  courage to even call myself an artist. It took motherhood for me to reconnect with my body, my appetites and my desire to nourish our health through real food.

So really, I have my daughter to thank for all the big shifts happening in my own life. Birthing the mother in me was the catalyst for this journey I am on, this journey of coming home to myself.

:: Pause ::

Life is full of paradox. But I like it that way. Black and white would be so boring and bland. Truth is always much more beautiful.

And the beautiful irony of what I’m living out these days is this: I can’t be a mother without being me. And I can’t be me without being a mother. 

Your Turn: What about you? How’s motherhood for you these days? And if you liked this article, sharing is the kind thing to do. Thanks friends!

Year of the Dress: Ditching the Pants And Other Radical Acts of Pleasure

Brown and Yellow

When I first conceived of the Year of the Dress challenge, I didn’t anticipate how challenging it would be to do so as a mama to a young child. I’m so used to getting up and putting on my mama wear (translation: yoga pants and shirt) that the novelty of having to wear something beautiful almost everyday excited me and I didn’t think through logistical challenges, like playing with my daughter while wearing a skirt! While week one started out pretty easy, by the end of this week, I was filled with all kinds of doubts. Thoughts like, this is so stupid! and it doesn’t really matter kept popping in my mind.

In fact, I was so close to calling the whole thing off. Besides, no one really participated. I felt so silly about the whole thing.

And just then, as the Universe would have it, I opened an email from Mama Gena, with the headline: Just how radical are you ? I discovered Mama Gena last year, and I loved her message about women and Pleasure. Never in a million years would I have imagined myself wanting to learn from someone like her, but oh how things change…

Anyway, I digress like a bad rabbit trail.

I took the quiz and I discovered that I fluctuate between B and C and D (check out the quiz and I dare you to take it!). And right there, I felt doubly resolved to carry on with my Year of the Dress challenge and make everyday a life of Pleasure. I owe it to myself, with all the years of my Pleasure-Deficit Disorder behind me.

For many of us, it doesn’t come naturally anymore to choose something just because it feels Good, and yet Feeling Good is inherent in our design. It makes decision making so darn simple. Does it truly feel Good to me? But with all these years that I’ve mistaken Feeling Good as something evil and to be avoided, it takes awhile to get into the habit of knowing what truly feels Good, knowing why and choosing that.

Here’s a list of what I know Feels So Good and yet I still choose to feel otherwise:

  • Sleeping for 8-9 hours every night feels so darn good and yet some nights, I stay up past bedtime just because I can.
  • Passing up on grains, sugar and dairy feels so darn good and yet, when I’m surrounded by these things, I momentarily forget, I shove stuff in my mouth and I make myself feel crappy.
  • Eating and drinking greens feel so darn good and yet, I get lazy and wonder why I don’t have as much energy when I go without them.
  • Carving out alone time feels so good and yet, when weekends come, I struggle with guilt and thinking that I’m a bad wife and mom for not wanting to be with my family all the time.
  • Unplugging from the internet feels so good and yet, I still sometimes take my Ipad with me to bed, as if I’m missing out if I get behind on what’s going on online.
  • Reaching out to others and serving on my own terms feel so good and yet I give in to the temptation of appearing to be need-free and sufficient while saying yes to people sheerly out of trying to please them. We really got it backwards.
  • Being present to my child feels so good and yet I constantly get distracted with snatching every Present moment on my iPhone and attending to all sorts of tasks I think I need to do around the house.
  • Asking my husband directly for what I need and approaching him intimately when I want both feel so good. Yet I expect him to intuitively know what I need and  I wait for him to make the first move when it comes to sex.
  • Taking care of myself by getting dressed with care feels so good, and yet when morning comes, I listen to the voice telling me it’s useless, pointless and vain. What’s the point, it tells me. You’re fat and hopelessly out of style. And so I grab my comfort clothes and not even bother to wash my face, because what the hey? Who cares?
But here’s the thing, dear Mamas. Pleasure is central to our Wellness. Wholeness. Pleasure is our True Wealth. Ditching the Pants is not just a fashion statement. It’s a radical act, a revolutionary statement to our abiding commitment to Feeling Good and not just Doing Good.  There’s been a long-standing war on Pleasure, and it’s time to abandon the Path of Feeling Like Crap.
And for me, it starts with something as simple as wearing a dress.

Your Turn: So let me ask you, what feels Good to you right now? Do you know? And do you know why? What’s keeping you from doing that? Would wearing a dress once a week feel Good? What would that do to your level of Pleasure? As usual, if you liked this article, sharing is the kind thing to do.

P.S. If you have thought about participating, please don’t be shy! You don’t have to wear a dress everyday single freakin’ day. Wear it once a week if you’d like. Or maybe wearing jewelry or some hot undies Feel Good to you. Whatever. If you are a blogging about your experience, leave a link to your post in the comments section. Or if you are participating on Instagram, you can use the hashtag #yearofthedress.

The Too-Tired-To-Write-Something-Coherent-Edition (And A Special Video that Will Make You Smile!)

I was going to write about how blogging is changing my life, but oh boy I need to get to bed. I’m sick and behind on a lot of things! I’m not sure if I mistakenly said yes to too many things or it’s just a matter of figuring out my own stylish system to make my bright ideas happen. As Seth Godin rightly asks, “Are you a serial idea-starting person? The goal is to be an idea-shipping person.” But how to be an idea-shipping person? Or better yet, how to be an idea-shipping-homeschooling-real-food-sorta-crunchy multi-passionate mama? Also, I find that when I start to focus on my work a bit too much, I tend to neglect the homefront and vice versa. I don’t believe in balance but I don’t think I like the see-saw ride very much either!So I’m reading up on how to make ideas happen and hooking up with the fellow multipotentialites from Puttylike, because I’m so ADD it’s not even funny.

So just random updates today that I want to share with y’all because I seriously can’t put together even scraps for your reading consumption.  So here’s a mis-mash of what’s happening, what I’m dreaming of and asking for.

  • Have I shared how I’m working towards becoming  a life coach for moms? Eeps! I found a coach training program as well as an amazing Wise Women Leadership training with an awesome soulful coach starting next month. I want to apply what I learn towards inspiring and empowering moms to live their big, bold and beautiful lives. I thought I wanted to be a therapist/counselor but now I think coaching is where it’s at! I’ll share more as this part of my life unfolds!
  •  One of the other big thing I’m looking forward to this March is my two week Nia White Belt Training here in Seattle! It’s the first step towards becoming an instructor and I’m super thrilled to train under Jill Pagano! I’ve started to listen to some of the Nia teleseminars  offered on NiaNow. And so far so good. I’m beyond excited!
  • Right now, my challenge is to carve out the time to do all this and more. So far, I have a once a week help (thanks Weina!) which has been awesome. It’s nice to have that break mid-week and I’m hoping I can do add 1 or 2 more days to that. I don’t know why I waited so long to do this! But also…
  • I’m considering becoming an early bird.  I wrote a year or so ago about the early to morning, early to bed myth and I think I’m recanting. My daughter goes to bed around 730/800 at night and I’m just too tired to crank out something creative by then. Since she’s mostly given up her naps, I don’t have time in the afternoon to work my stuff anymore. Plus, the other day, when hubby stayed home from work and gifted me with a couple of hours in the morning at a coffeeshop – I fell in love working first thing in the morning. I think maybe doing my stuff before I put on the mama suit will serve me better, sort of like how getting dressed nicely first thing does.  The whole putting yourself first paradigm. The question is, how do I make that happen?
  • Longing for sisterhood/circle of mamas I can be part of. I strongly believe that women were meant to raise children TOGETHER, not on our own, as our ancient foremothers have done.   But I’m terrified honestly, to make new friends. Leaving my childhood faith has meant leaving behind a huge network of people I turned to in the past and it’s such a challenge to rebuild.  Especially that I’m a work-at-home/homeschooling mama. Hmmm.
  • Freelance design work: I don’t do a lot of freelance web/blog design work but I needed to save some money for my coaching and Nia training so I’ve taken up a couple of projects for the Month of February. It’s fun but it’s keeping me busy before my gigs start next month.I have room for maybe 1-2 more projects before I can’t take any more clients so if you know anyone who wants to pretti-fy their blog/website, kindly pass the word?
  • On the home front, we’re immersing ourselves in lots of art! We’re doing lots of painting and drawing and MUSICALS! My daughter is so into all the Annie songs (I let her watch the musical snippets from the movie) and I’m introducing her to other child-friendly broadway songs via Pandora! She LOVES em! Which inspired me to get back into learning the piano as well. My skills are so elementary and rusty but we’ve been playing simple songs on the keyboard this week and have had a lot of fun.
  • We’re also getting ready for another attempt at the GAPS diet. We did the Full GAPS last month but my husband’s birthday celebration sort of got us off track. It takes a lot of preparation, support and really, strategic planning so I’m dreaming of starting a GAPS group for anyone who wants to do it with us. I’m starting to write posts I will share here on Wednesdays beginning with why we are doing it.  If you suspect you have compromised gut health (as most of us who’ve been on the Standard American Diet for awhile do), you might want to consider it. I have scalp psoriasis, struggle with fatigue/IBS/Candida, have low-blood sugar issues and can’t tolerate a lot of foods (gluten, non-cultured dairy).I feel super good on the diet and I really want to do it until my gut is healed.
  • And the Year of the Dress? It’s still happening, only I’m  changing the rules so more people can participate. How about committing to dressing up ONCE A WEEK and then posting your photos? Anyone? Anyone?

Ok, that’s all I have.  May you always dance to whatever music life brings you, and may you do it with abandon and joy!

So Maybe Motherhood Is Hard After All…

Or not.

Lemme explain.

I totally get it when moms (and dads) talk about everything that is challenging about parenting. Because it is. Most of this stuff does not come naturally to many of us and life with children forces us to re-imagine a different way of living and being.

I don’t take any of that lightly. Nor do I claim that I have mastered the art of mothering.

I’m in a process like you. Practice and progress, not perfection.

When I say that motherhood does not have to be hard, I mean that our experience doesn’t have to be one of constant frustration and stress. In any given moment that it feels hard, it’s only because we are resisting What Is. We carry with us a whole lot of expectations on how things should be, and when things don’t go as we hoped? Resistance.

We struggle and suffer when we Resist Reality.

Because the honest truth? Reality is much much kinder, more beautiful than we think it is. It is our stories, perceptions, interpretations of Reality that bring us through unnecessary suffering and grief. We miss out on the Joy before us simply because our thoughts are elsewhere, not Here.

We’ve forgotten to Embrace the Gift of the Present.

This is probably not the best example, but it’s what I can think of at the moment: My little girl refuses to go poop in the potty and there’s nothing I can do to make her do it peacefully.  That situation itself is not hard or easy. It’s not good or bad. It is what it is. If I accept the situation at face value, then things become easier to deal with. It only becomes hard when I start to make judgements about myself or my daughter because of the situation. I judge her to be rebellious or strong-willed or whatever while I judge myself as the worst mother of all. But once I start to embrace what Is without all the icky baggage and Trust, I am able to possess a certain clarity that allows me to figure out what I can do right at the moment. And really, that’s all I need.

Because that’s what response-ability is all about, isn’t it? The Ability to Respond at whatever the Moment brings us.

And when we are clouded with all sorts of negative emotions and thoughts, we can’t see our situation for what it is. We only see what’s hard. And that’s when we get all tangled up in all sorts of drama (or shit if you prefer).

Of course, some days, I am better at Practicing Presence than others. Like how the past couple of days, when it’s been ridiculously crazy and I have momentarily lost my footing. I just wanted to hide under the covers all day long and was wishing for things to be different. I’ve been sort of confused, overwhelmed and cranky. I took it out on my husband. And I wondered what happened, and how I got to hell so quickly.

But when I finally paused and brought myself into Now, when I just accepted the situation for what it is with as much kindness as I can afford myself, I realized that I hadn’t taken the time this weekend for my regular me-time that often restores me and refreshes me for the week. And I remembered how much I needed that. Because mothering takes a lot out of me.

And that clarity was all I needed to sort of start over, live my Best life and be Present right here, right now.

And I’m back to enjoying and growing from all that this Moment has to offer.

PS If you must know, I figured out that her poop issues is gut-health related in nature. So I’m figuring out how to do the GAPS diet again, but with less stress and more joy. I’ll keep you posted on that.

PPS: I am rethinking about the everyday blogging. I’m taking weekends off! But I’ll be on Facebook everyday. I created A Nourishing Home Page there – more to come! We’re also making some major changes to this blog and am working on a sister blog so stay tuned!!!

Year of the Dress: Unleashing Your Beauty And the Shero’s Journey



“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure”

Y’all have heard this quote from Marianne Williamson. And perhaps you may have said to yourself, “What? Me? Powerful?” only to belt out a nervous laugh and dismiss the whole idea as absurd.

(Or maybe that was just me.)

What is it about Power that we are so afraid of? Especially us women? And what does wearing dresses and feeling Beautiful have anything to do with Power?

I don’t have all the answers, but this is what this journey is all about. This Year of the Dress.

Oh yes.

Because it’s not really about fashion. Oh, it’s so much more than that.

It’s an experiment, a quest to find out whether Beauty matters.  Could we be both Powerful and Beautiful all at once? Or even better, could our True Power as women be found in our Femininity?

And what does it mean to own our Femininity?

::Pause::

On sort of a related note, February tends to be a downer month for me. There’s another gag-me holiday coming up (er, do I need to tell you what that holiday is?) and it’s like the final stretch of Winter. But this year, I’m making this coming month specially full of Presence, Purpose and Pleasure (and add Power to that mix of P’s !) by taking a class taught by no other than Jennifer Louden! Whee!

The Shero’s Journey!

I’ve been following Jennifer Louden on and off and this particular class caught my heart. It called to me and felt so fitting for this journey I am on, this return back to my Feminine Essence, to my Power and my Beauty both. Will you join me? Here’s who the class is for:

  • Women who keep putting off a dream, downgrading an idea, or hiding from their true desire
  • Women betwixt-between — you may have been laid off, divorced, empty nest, or newly healthy
  • Women who want to savor life and serve — not get burned out and overwhelmed
  • Women who have a feeling of being called but keep stopping or getting confused

The cool thing is, if you are strapped for cash, they give you a Pay Your Price Option ($175/$100/$50). You can even apply for a scholarship! How awesome is that? The course is for 5 weeks and I think being with a group of women on the same journey is priceless. It would be amazing to have some of you join me in that course. What say you? Could your Shero’s Journey be calling you too? It starts this Wednesday, February 1st (I know! I’m late once again in sharing this awesome resource!) so if your heart started to beat a little bit faster reading this, you better sign up, sistah!

Full Disclosure: I am a proud affiliate of Entheos Academy but only because I LOVE their courses and have learned a lot from many of the teachers who share their unique wisdom there.

P.S. If you want to join me in The Year of the Dress Challenge, know that you can change up the rules any way you want. The point of this whole thing is find ways everyday to Feel, Honor and Celebrate your Beauty. Wearing dresses does it for me. What about you?